The first word that comes to mind when you talk of Maids is "Problem". My experience with them started when I got married and had my daughter. I have lost count of the number of maids I must have had during last 6 years. I cannot resist myself from putting down my experiences on this blog as I feel many of the working mothers out there must have experienced or are yet to experience them in your life.
The first one was Miny, who was a simple and demure lady who had no city experience. Since my daughter was only 3 months old, I wanted someone who could stay with us and look after the house and take care of my daughter too (like a nanny). One thing I must say that she was very attached to my daughter and took good care of her under the guidance of my in-laws. She had her own little problems like anybody else. With 3 daughters and no husband, it was tough decision for her to leave them in the village and come and work in the city for money. Once in a month, she is used to go to her native to see her children. Everybody at home liked her as she was uncomplicated and took care of my daughter very well. Lot many of our friends who visited us would comment on how lucky I was to have such a wonderful maid.
Well, luck perhaps did not want to hang around for too long as, after 2 yrs, Miny's youngest daughter developed some growth on her head and she had to be operated on. Miny took about 10 grand from me for her medical expenses etc., with a promise to pay me back every month. She paid almost 2 grand back, when suddenly one night she received a call from native and she had to rush to check on her daughter. That was the last I saw of her. Got a call from her after 2 weeks informing that she will not be able to return back as her daughter needed her attention. Though, I was a bit upset when I heard her on the phone, later, on thinking, I realised that Miny probably had her priorities right. She promised me that she will work in her native and return the money back slowly. Ofcourse, I did not have too much hope and as expected, it never got returned.
The next one was Shantha who was recommended by my friend. She was exactly opposite to Miny, in the sense that she was a very confident lady and was very good with cooking. She was a child's ideal friend as she knew a bit of english and also played with them. She was a more open in communication and always used to tell me her problems and used to look for some comforting words from me. I was posted overseas for 2 months and was reluctant to leave my daughter alone so I told her to come along with me, my daughter and husband. She readily agreed as she was already a passport holder. She had no problems getting accustomed overseas. She was confident enough to go around to the market to buy the provisions for home. She had a good time and so did we.
The only issue with Shantha was that she was too materialistic and had big amibitions in terms of bettering her life by ensuring her 2 sons and daughter had good education and could manage on their own when they grew up. Since her husband was jobless, he used to take care of the children but ofcourse it was quite clear that he did not have full control. The daughter was not too good in studies and stopped going to school after her 8th. Shantha wanted to save some money and get her married off when she turned 18.
While working for me, she had few issues with her daughter, in terms of, her having relationship with some boys in the neighbourhood. So, Shantha decided to place her in a good home as a live-in maid. She got her a job in Ooty and one fine morning she gets a call that her daughter got kidnapped on the way from Chennai to Mettupalayam. She took off from work for a week, looking for her and took my help too, to get her daughter traced. We managed to finally get her daughter back but this incident somehow made Shantha decide to go overseas and make some quick bucks to get her daughter married off before some new incident occurred. She went to Hongkong and was drawing a 10k salary. In 2 years time, I heard she married her daughter off and after a year later, I came to know that her daughter committed suicide.
Since both Miny & Shantha came to me through a friend, after Shantha left, I had to approach the agency for a new maid. Here is when I learnt that these Maid agencies have no business ethics, and, there only motive is to make money. They give you a maid with a guarantee to replace with a new one if the existing one leaves or if you do not like her work. Some give the guarantee for one year and some for 6 months. You have to pay these agencies 1 month salary that yr maid is going to get. Invariably, you will find that just to get their fees, they will bring in a very good maid and then within a month, they will also be looking to place her in a new home with better salary, so that they can get their fees. Agencies call these maids and tell them of the new opportunity waiting for them. Hearing this, they immediately concoct a story and leave our place. Some just act as if they are taking their monthly off to go to native and they never return.
So, in a desperate bid, you get in touch with the agency informing them that the previous one has left and you need a new one. 99% of the time, they will tell you that they do not have one at present and as and when they get a good one, they will send her across. Ofcourse, that will not happen, and we, inorder to get our home in order, also try to reach another agency to find a new one. I must had 10-12 different maids after Shantha left but none stuck for too long. So, the story goes on.........
All over Chennai, there are numerous agencies doing this work and I am yet to come across one which works with some ethics. Maybe, it is a good idea to have a NGO take on this work of placing the women in need of work with decent families. The money they get. atleast, can be used for a good cause.
(the names of the maids have been changed to protect their identity)
